All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
