We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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