East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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