hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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