this will be a night to untag.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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