We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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