i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
