How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
This house was built for laser tag.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
You LOVE me.
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