Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Will exercising make me less horny?
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