Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
this boner is exhausting
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
