Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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