its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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