Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Congratulations! We have a period
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize