Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I love you. Go after that dick
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
