No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
