We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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