When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
