I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
