I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
