I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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