Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
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