A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
my poor anus
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
