honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Randomize
