he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
