I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
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