i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
