I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize