Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize
