do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
