i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
