He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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