shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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