I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
