I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Randomize