We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
