hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
The feeling are messing with the penis
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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