is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
