hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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