When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Randomize