She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
