As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
