I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I can feel your judgement through the phone
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
