Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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