Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
