Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
