yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
