I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Randomize
