i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
