Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
