She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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